Charley Chaplin

I’ve never been one to be overly nostalgic about anything. It’s always been my nature to push through, onward and upward. At least since I was twelve and my father died. We had been very close. After spending a year of non stop crying and grieving, my personality changed somewhat, except in as far as art goes. I was always an artist, and always will be. It’s not really something that I chose, so much as it being an intrinsic part of who I am. It has saved me in many ways on countless occasions. Compelling me to push through the good and the bad. That’s why it’s weird for me to be getting nostalgic. I have a sneaky suspicion that the plague may have something to do with it. I find myself listening more often to music that I connected to in my youth. Which is, unusual to say the least.

It started with me looking for upbeat music to listen to in the morning because I was feeling a little blue, which is also something that I tend to push down into the depths. Unlike a lot of people who feel the need to bond with others over their angst, problems, or if they stubbed their toe, that’s just not something I ever liked doing. ( Except for with my ex, because that’s a given, and even then not nearly as often as most people.) And I can say this with some acumen, simply from observation in life and social media. In any case this reticence on my part, is mostly because to rehash things that have happened, or how I’m feeling, just seems to make it worse for me. So there you go. Yet, now here I am, listening to music that meant something to me when I was young and wading through the struggles of being a kid, growing up, having kids, raising kids, etc..

I put Pandora on, starting with the upbeat… I chose early Beatles, and it’s algorithm or whatever, starts scrolling through a universe of songs I haven’t heard or thought about in decades from groups I loved and felt I belonged to at different ages of my life. And other than scents, music is one of those rare things that can instantly transport you to that second, that hour, that day, that decade that you lived, grew, regressed, loved and hated, in.

From Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, to Led Zeppelin, to Sgt. Pepper, Pink Floyd, Creedence Clearwater Revival, The Foundations, Sonny Terry and Brownie McGhee, and a host of other memories. Some better than others. And this was just the ones that came up from that first group I picked that Pandora was scraping my heartstrings with.

In reality, it doesn’t make me feel sad. Picture one of those movies where the wise older person is reminiscing, narrating about times past, with love. This is not to say that my past was rosy. It was actually very difficult. But I am also not one to look for sympathy when things happen. Other than when I was very young and had lost both my parents. But even with that, I eventually came to realize that that was not how I wanted to see myself, or for others to see me; a Dickens-esk orphan. I had to be strong and make a lot of tough decisions. The only difference from many other people, is that I was doing it at a much younger age. For example. I didn’t have much family left, and those I did, well, I just couldn’t imagine having to live with them. At fifteen I became an emancipated minor, and got a little apartment. How this played out, is a story for another time, heheh. Don’t want to overwhelm you all. If it were to be made into a TV show, it could either be portrayed as a drama, with love, loss, and intrigue, or a dramedy, with the aforementioned, and a comedy of errors, and maybe some slapstick thrown in. (Not much though as slapstick is basically the lowest form of humor, other than puns. Except of course through the genius of Chaplin. Chaplin, who despite some really bad personal choices, was the epitome of slapstick.)

I continue to grow with my painting. I do, (rarely) have nostalgia for my earlier paintings and scribblings, but always with a very critical eye. Ask any artist, and for the most part they don’t like their past works. That’s because art is one of those things where by it’s very nature, is ever changing. Most of us artists feel that we have improved over time. I can only speak for myself when I say that I prefer people to see my most recent work. Maybe it’s a bit of an ego thing, where we want people to see what we are capable of now, as opposed to then, Like, “oh god, my work now is so much better! Heheheh. Musicians too, are artists, and if they are dedicated and good, they evolve, as well. I think for them sometimes, it’s harder because so many fans will love a certain piece of music so much that any changes are abhorrent to them. They have my sympathies.

Nostalgia, a wistfulness for the past, can be a funny thing. It can become a rabbit hole that folks fall down, and find hard to climb out of. Or it can be something that we look at with wonder of how we survived it all, and pride that we did. We can take a look back for a little while, and then move forward.

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Day tripping

Hey guys! Here where I live, we have had, yet again another week of mostly rain. In light of that, (or lack there of light), when we do get the odd sunny day, and it also happens to be my day off, well, if I have a chance to go somewhere, I go for it. Today’s adventure was to take a day trip over hither and yon, through the lovely Catskills. So we grabbed our water bottles and hightailed it to the mountains. And other than one town being a place better left unmentioned, and a twenty minute detour through the hills of “Deliverance”, it was a beautiful day. Also, due to this impromptu diversion, I’m a bit late with this post. But here it is, and this “From The Sketch Book” is a little different. I thought that maybe you would be interested in a little insight into how the mind of an artist works, or at least this artist. So this blog is just that.

“Q and A a Day”

Some time ago I happened upon an interesting sketchbook of prompts. It’s a thick book with four blocks per page and one prompt per page. It’s set up so that the artist can return to a block from each page, over the course of four years. This struck me as a very cool idea. And the best part is, although originally a seventeen dollar, (nineteen dollar book in Canada), it was at a dollar store! That’s right guys, a dollar! So without further adieu, I give you sketches from “Q & A a day” , A Dollar Store Score. (I should also mention that these sketches usually took under a half hour, some only minutes, so are by no means, “master pieces”, and are in no particular order.)

“Sunflowers”

Apparently I was “feeling sunflowers on this day”. I have no idea why. But I thought this would be a good one to start with, as most of today was very “sun flowery”. (Except later in the afternoon when surprise, it rained. Which is OK because we were home by then.)

“Hamlet”.

This one’s simple, the only Shakespearean thing I could think of was “Hamlet”.

”Dandy Lion”

I guess this is my idea of a “pattern in nature”, or maybe I just felt like drawing a dandelion.

“The Tramp and The Kid”

Somewhere in “editing”, the note I had written about this little drawing got waylayed. I actually did this while at the “other” job, (don’t tell 😉 For some reason there was a book about Charley Chaplin on the shelf. This is my rendition of a scene from that book.

Self Portrait. (I think I need some lotion.)

“Balloon Kid” forever!

Still looking for a “Balloon Kid” so I can be nostalgic. There were only a few games I liked and was actually able to play; this, Sonic, and the game all parents liked, Tetras. (I do like “Kingdom Hearts” now, but rarely have time to play), ah, well.

“Ladie’s”

If you’re a woman, this needs no explanation.

“Here Be Dragons”

Although this isn’t my best dragon drawing, I liked the idea of this because of one of my favorite quotes; “Here Be Dragons” meaning “dangerous, or unexplained territories”, a quote often used on ancient maps. Which pretty much sums up my life experiences.